The Weekly Update.

I think I have a minor case of writers block. So I've decided to write an update as to what has been going on.

Rowen started his new daycare on Wednesday. He seems to really be enjoying it. He has yet to through any kind of fit when I drop him off in the morning. Today he gave me a kiss and hug and then practically pushed me out the door. And then whenwe went to pick him up, he has this look of near disappointment that we have interupted his play time. I have to say I "almost" miss the guilt tears that he used to lay on me.

Elora went to gymnastics this past Tuesday and seemed to have a good time. She's mentioned a couple times that she wants to go back so I think I will enroll her for next month. It can only help in burning off some of that excess energy that she has. She seems to be establishing a little free will of her own lately. I've notice that she will usually stay inside at Adventure Club to draw or play board games. Eilish on the other hand will head outside to play on the playground.

Over the next couple of weeks we will find out how much Eilish "really" likes gymnastics. This Saturday She is attending a clinic in St. Louis. Next week she will be in the gym four days and the week after that she will be there five days. They will be focusing on thier new beam and floor routines. Yes, it is the "if I hear that floor music one more time I think I'm going to start having self-inflicted male non-pattern baldness." That is me pulling my own hair out if no one gets the previous sentence. It sounded funny at the time.

Well that is all for know. I gotta have Eilish up and ready to go By 7:45.

Peace and Good Cheers,
Marty

Our First Day.

Today was our first day, in probably a month, that there wasn't someone here holding our hands, supporting us. It was a little unsettling. Don't get me wrong the day went fine. It's just that I actually had to stand up and start getting things done for myself.

I took the kids to school and daycare, then started on the list of things that I needed to get done. First, I dropped off a large jar of candy to the nurses and crew of 5N at Regional Hospital. I wanted to say thanks for all thier support and care for Christa and us. Second, I went to Barnes and Noble and bought The Next Place for Reverend Amy. When I dropped it off she was just getting ready to buy the book from Amazon. Third, I brought Christa's ashes home where they will stay for now. Forth, I enrolled Rowen in his new daycare at Stephens College.

The daycare at Stephens looks like a nice program. So far, I have only found two draw-backs. The first being that the program runs the same schedule as the college. Therefore when school is out, so is daycare. It will be interesting at Thanksgiving and Christmas. The second thing is that I will now have to fix Rowen's lunch everyday. They provide snacks, but no lunch. Could be interesting.

Time to start my list for tomorrow.

Peace and Good Cheers,
Marty

The Memorial Service

Christa's memorial service was September the 22nd at Calvery Episcopal Church. It was really nice to see that many people show up to celebrate Christa's life. She would have been pleased. Christa's mom and my sister made three poster boards with pictures from different stages of Christa's life. They were displayed in the foyer of the church along with the flowers that people had sent. Reverend Amy lead the congregation in a service that was posititve, focusing on the life of Christa. I can only say that Reverand Amy seems to be one of those people that a person is distant to meet to guide you through tough times. I was worried that Christa's parents might feel uncomfortable with a "formal" service, but all Sue could say was how wonderful Amy is and how she really enjoyed the service.

After the service everyone was invited to the house for a reception. There was at least fifty people here. Luckly the storms that were supposed to blow in never formed. It topped out at about 80 degrees so we left the doors opened and welcomed all. If all the people that showed up for either the service of the reception are any indication, Christa should be proud of the mark she left on this community.

Now if we can only pull off the memorial that I have planned, I think we will have said our thanks and goodbyes to Christa in a way that would have left her speechless.

Thanks and Good Cheers,
Marty

The End and The Beginning.

On monday, September 18th, Christa passed away. It was about 11:30 in the morning on a day with the first hint of fall in the air. Christa's breathing simply shallowed with each breath, it stopped, and her heart just faded away. She seemed to be in no pain or discomfort. I'm relieved that I was the only one there when she passed. I could give you all the details but they seem of little importance now.

I feel it is important to say that my wife fought her decease with every once of strength she had. She was sure that there were so many things left for her to do. Those task now fall to me and I will do my best not to fail her.

We went today to plan Christa's memorial service. Her body will be cremated and the ashes placed in a walnut box with her name ingraved on it. Someday, in the future, I hope to find a place to return her to the earth. Ashes to ashes and dust to dust.

I'm finding this to be a very surreal experiance. The thought of never seeing her again is beyond belief. Even after she had passed away, and her body was still laying in the bed, I would occasionaly catch her out of the corner of my eye and I could swear she was still breathing. It was so unreal not to see her chest rising and falling with each breath.

So please say a little prayer for Christa and us as we begin our new journeys and remember our old ones. And if your so inclined, join with me and lite a candle for Christa on her birthday December 26th.

Peace and Good Cheers,
Marty

Finally an Update

My wife has been using the laptop at the hospital to post on her blog so I haven't been able to get online. She is settling in at Boone Hospital. She says she feels like a prisoner. Not that they are mean to her, she just gets tired of looking at the same four walls. I think I will take our cat, Sedi, to visit her on Tuesday and see if that will cheer her up.

She has been suffering from nausea the last couple of day. They have had to step up the level of medication for the nausea and that seems to be making her drowsy. Hopefully her body can adjust to the medication. She has two more radiation treatments to finish this week. These treatments do seem to be helping with the headaches.

She did get to visit with the kids today. I heard they were well behaved. They uaually are when they are with Grandma. I visited after work for a couple of hours. She seemed to be in a little better spirits.

Getting tired and heading to bed.

Peace,
Marty

Three Good Days.

The last three days have been pretty good ones for Christa. She has been able to do a little walking and enjoy reading the paper. Tomorrow we will hopefully know whether she will be going to Boone Hospital or coming home. I also have a list of questions for the Doctor. The main thing is can we find some to take her out of the hospital so that she can get some fresh air and feel the sunshine.

Christa's sister and brother-in-law left early this morning. Her brother is leaving around noon tomorrow. She will miss them.

My house doesn't look like my house anymore. That is a good thing. I think my family has been practising for Trading Spaces. They have done a wonderful job.

Our cats seem to be going out of thier way to be friendly. They miss thier therapy sessions with Christa.

Peace,
Marty

Extreme Home Makeover.

Today Christa seemed to be doing well. She ate a big breakfast, got up and did a little walking, and read the Sunday paper. She seems to be in good spirits. I miss her at home.

Since all the bad news came about, both my wife's family and mine have come into town. Her parents have been watching the kids giving me time to be with Christa. My parents, and sister, have been doing their version of Extreme Home Makeover on our house.

My kin have cleaned, painted, yanked up carpet, put down flooring, and carpeted stairs. All of this without one word about the condition of my house. Thank you. I'm sure they are going to need a vacation just to recover from this visit.

Christa's family have been watching our kids as well as Christa's sisters kids. I would say that may be as tough a job as the one the "makeover" crew has taken on. The kids have spent the last three nights at Grandma Sue's hotel room. They've been swimming, watching movies, and braving Chuckie Cheese.

Thanks to all for being here.

Peace,
Marty

Where To Start?

I'm 41, married, with three kids. My wife and I have been married for fifteen years. Our children are 3, 6, and 9.

In January of 2005 my wife was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer. This cancer is very aggressive, and rare, occurring in less than five percent of the women who get breast cancer. Her cancer has spread to her bones, lungs, and brain. Two weeks ago we found out that this cancer had spread to her central nervous system and that she has "days to weeks" to live. The doctors have nothing left to offer except to manage her pain to make what time she does have left as comfortable as possible.

That is the kind of news that can bring ones life to a screeching halt. Two weeks ago we were making the best of a bad situation. Now we are literally taking each day, one at a time, trying to decide what is the best path toward our impending doom.

I have to say that I really expected to be the one to go first. Not this soon, sometime way down the line. But it seems that that is not the plan.

Peace,
Marty